I want to share my personal lessons from The Max DaSilva Group.
When I started Youtube, I had end goals of becoming a teacher like some of my favorite content creators on Youtube.
After close to a year of doing daily Youtube videos, I was ready to take the next step on my entrepreneurial and spiritual journey.
The Max DaSilva group was created on September 18, 2016 and it is now at 1,354 members.
Before writing this, I flipped to my bookmark in The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren (it’s a guide to spiritual journey rooted in Christianity). I had been thinking about the phrase “Iron Sharpens Iron” all day and I wanted to sum up major lessons from the group. I flip open my book and it lands right on the exact quote:
Let’s get into 3 major lessons you can immediately take action upon from my experience running the Max DaSilva group.
Someone is always going through something and there is benefits to listen to them.
I have been a helpful ear for many during my time with the Facebook group, reading messages every single day since starting it. This took all my time, and most of the time I slept very little to accommodate this while working a 40 hour day job as well. I was learning.
At this specific point in my life, I was preparing to serve the people that would be reaching out to me. I was the listener. I received so many lessons and understandings that I never could have gotten alone.
I have lived out many men’s lives in my mind.
When listening to a someone’s story, I visualize it all. I feel what he’s feeling (to the best of my ability). I’m there with them. When I am living my life, the lessons and crucial points of men’s stories have kept me from having to go through the same thing they did.
I watched a recent Jordan Peterson Q&A (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=la8gCrT7U7o&t=438s) and he spoke about his advice to a young counselor who was on his way to becoming a therapist.
Jordan recommended to read all the books on his recommended book list on his website. I actually just bought two:
He then said, “It’s almost impossible to overestimate the degree to which merely listening is helpful if you are a counselor.
Lots of people have no one that will listen to them.
That’s a real problem because people actually think by talking. For many people who are isolated they have no one to talk to and that means they don’t think.”
Teaching makes you a better student.
When I began making Youtube videos, I wanted to share my experiences and what was currently working for me. I didn’t want to come across as a know-it-all who had answers because that was simply not true.
I wanted to be an open book where connections and reflections were encouraged.
I’ve read from Russell Brunson, who is a wildly successful entrepreneur, that you only need to be one step ahead of someone else to teach them. He goes over this in his books DotCom Secrets and Expert Secrets. I agree with this to a point; because I was openly searching for answers myself.
With the creation of the Facebook group I was asked my advice on things constantly.
At first I found it painful because I wanted to disqualify anything I was about to say. I wanted it to be blatantly clear that I am simply a fellow human trying his best. If I say something, great, I still wanted the listener to remain open minded and test things for themselves.
As I gave advice on hair loss, meditation, exercise, and relationships, I have grown to be a better teacher.
I make it clear what I have done with the knowledge I have and then I share it with a request for one’s own action.
It’s one thing to be able to walk, but can you teach someone how to walk? What if that person has a disabled leg and they don’t even know it is disabled, they simply know they can’t walk well. This is where teaching opens up dilemmas.
With situations like this, I realize there are many more things to learn about others and life itself. I may have some knowledge about how my internal systems work, but teaching opened up my lack of knowledge for external systems.
The lesson is to put yourself out there and if someone asks for you to be a teacher then try your best to explain your knowledge and the knowledge of what you know you don’t know.
Teaching showed me how much more I don’t know than I thought previously.
Nothing gets done without accountability.
I meditate every day because I run the meditation log in the Facebook group. Without the log, I would be maybe meditating 3 times a week tops.
The workout log in the Facebook group has given me the mindset that every day is gym day, and if I want a day off I must understand why rather than just unconsciously not going.
Making Youtube videos has held me accountable to reflect on my thinking and to think through what is happening in my life. With my videos, I have a brutally clear view at how I was a month ago, a year ago, and two years ago. I am on the line.
I have witnessed a few men make bold statements in the Facebook group and then go live out those statements.
I have witnessed people fear making a decision and then stay in the same loop for a year. In order to get anything done, a public statement of accountability is a significantly helpful tool to use to make sure it gets done.
I used this when I decided I was going to write a book about hair loss.
I finally finished the work I set out to do with the book. It took my lazy ass some time, but I got it done with the fire that I set on December 14, 2016.
You can join the Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/880224685446069
You can watch the video I made about this article here: https://youtu.be/gIdMvcd31Q0